New beginnings, old habits, new challenges

Why is it so hard to change? Why are we wired the way we are? In Rwanda we are very fatalistic about human nature “Phhh.. that’s what he’s like you can’t change him.” We even learn to live with the faults of people and accept them rather than object and try to express our emotions.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Why is it so hard to change? Why are we wired the way we are? In Rwanda we are very fatalistic about human nature "Phhh.. that’s what he’s like you can’t change him.” We even learn to live with the faults of people and accept them rather than object and try to express our emotions.

There is the story of the scorpion and the frog, the scorpion wanted to cross the river and asked the frog for a ride on his back. "No you will sting me.” Said the frog, "But I will be on your back; we will both sink and die.” The frog let the scorpion ride his back but when they got to the other side of the river, it stung him. "It is my nature, I can’t help it” said the scorpion.

Some psychologists say we are the sum of all our experiences that our past is wired into our sub-conscious and we can never change our character. It might not be true, we forget 95% of our daily experiences, if you look back two years to this day, most cannot remember what we were specifically doing. We can always reinvent ourselves, America has made a virtue of it, immigrants were encouraged to come over, change their names, history and live for the future. So that way you always have another chance to start again.

Success takes many attempts; you have to redefine what it is all the time.

So we strive for those two goals in life, success and happiness, more precisely that success will bring happiness. In reality happiness brings success, happiness makes you re-evaluate what you thought was success, happiness is your true nature. Sadly we are happy only a few minutes in our lives. We are always changing to chase an illusion when the reality is better, the sound of laughter,

when you played as a child, your first kiss, your wedding, birth of a child, these are the moments you remember as happiness. That is your true nature, not the sum of your experiences.

Coming to Rwanda definitely changed my direction in life, away from office drudgery in the west to good quality of life and freedom in Rwanda. I feel everyday is a new day with new possibilities, new horizons, Rwanda means boundless and it is.

So success is about new beginnings, new challenges, new goals, new targets, and new happiness. The most successful people in Kigali are really dynamic, in mining one day, banking the next, tourism in the afternoon, IT in the evening. Eventually something works and they keep moving, they keep winning, and that is life. The most successful people have an innate ability to forget failure but keep the lessons from failure.

Ends