Dear Aunt Silvia,

I am dating a divorced man and hope to marry him one day. I went to visit him one day and met his sister-in-law married to his cousin. Another visit to his home and other subsequent visits, the sister-in-law is always there in his house, in the name of helping him be at peace with himself and to help him go through the divorce.

I am now very sceptical about getting into marriage because I feel my space has been occupied by this sister-in-law. I love my man, what do I do about this sister-in-law?

Maryanne

Dear Maryanne,
This sister in law in question needs to be put where she belongs, and that is at her husbands’ house and not in yours.

There are some women who like taking advantage of some situations; in this case this sister in law is taking the advantage that her in-law is a divorcee and experiencing bouts of loneliness so she has thrown in her presence in his house and this I can tell you smells like a rotten rat.

If you love your man then you would do what is right for both of you, and that is to keep this other woman at arms length.

I can assure you that she might have a hidden agenda. Why would she always spend all her time in his house and not hers when she is a married woman? You need to talk this issue out very clearly with your husband to be.

If you don’t do it now you might open a pandora box later after committing your life to this relationship, and it will be already too late.

On the other hand your man might be as innocent as it sounds, so when tackling this issue make sure to bring it out as a concern and not as an accusation before you don’t know what is really going on.

By this approach you will be able to judge by yourself if the man is honest or not. And if there is anything going in between them, it will be up to you to decide what is best for you. Old habits die hard, better to tackle this issue now than later. The ball is in your court.

Ends