Dear Aunt Silvia,

I am a young man with a fiancé whom I will marry in the next six months. According to one of my fiancé’s relative, the girl whom I am planning to make my wife still wets her bed to date.

I have no way of finding out since we are both born again Christians and therefore can not spend a night together. Should I ask her about it, or should I wait for her to tell me about it. This is a woman who will be my wife and the mother to my children. What do I do? 

Rogers.

Dear Rogers,

I don’t think wetting a bed is such a grave matter for you to think twice about getting married to the love of your life, but on the other hand it is a serious medical condition that your wife –to be should be encouraged to seek medical advice.

Your fiancé might be suffering from Urinary Incontinence. Urinary incontinence (UI) is any involuntary leakage of urine. It is a common and distressing problem, which may have a profound impact on quality of life. Urinary incontinence almost always results from an underlying treatable medical condition but is under-reported to medical practitioners.

There is also a related condition for defecation known as faecal incontinence. Continence and maturation involve a balance between urethral closure and detractor muscle activity. Urethral pressure normally exceeds bladder pressure, resulting in urine remaining in the bladder.

 The proximal urethra and bladder are both within the pelvis. Intra-abdominal pressure increases (from coughing and sneezing) are transmitted to both urethra and bladder equally, leaving the pressure differential unchanged, resulting in continence.

Normal voiding is the result of changes in both of these pressure factors: urethral pressure falls and bladder pressure rises.

Urinary incontinence can be caused by many things among them some sickness like diabetes, brain disorders like multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s disease, strokes and spinal cord injury can all interfere with nerve function of the bladder- and even most new mothers who have given birth experience urinary incontinence for a while until their system goes back to normal. You are therefore advised to talk to your fiancé about her condition, once when accepts that she has a problem, and then you can help her seek medical attention.

The treatment options range from conservative treatment, behaviour management, medications and surgery. In all cases, the least invasive treatment is started first. Most treatment options are most appropriate for a specific underlying cause of the incontinence – and of course the success of treatment depends on the correct diagnosis in the first place. So don’t wait any longer help your fiancé the soonest and shun those relatives who might discourage your good will towards seeking proper medical attention for your future wife.

Ends