The daunting impact of lies

Lying is a completely unhealthy human habit. When it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships and in the overall quality of your life.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Lying is a completely unhealthy human habit. When it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships and in the overall quality of your life.

Psychologists have proved that perpetually lying makes individuals feel as though they are at the mercy of an unpredictable and powerful habit that they cannot control.

However, the impacts of lying are countless since both the liar and the victims of lies are affected.

"When someone is a liar and you know it, and they lie to you, it doesn’t hurt that much because it’s expected; but when someone you trust lies to you, it’s the worst form of betrayal,” said Catherine Gititu, a 24 year-old Policy Analyst who has been dating for four years.

According to Gititu, lies completely create distrust because at the end of the day, "everything he says somehow seems to be tainted by dishonesty.”

‘Small or big lies’, Gititu argues that, "There is nothing like a small lie, they are all big!”

She said if some can tell the truth about something small, there is no reason to lie about it. Adding that, "It’s even worse and very irritating when it’s not a protective lie!”

For this reason some people perceive that there is a need to lie for the greater good. This is in circumstances where someone’s life is in danger. However, over time analysts have proved that this theory does not hold water for long. Somehow, the truth reveals itself and the consequences are even worse.

For this reason, Gititu confesses that she can never understand perpetual liars.

"Perpetual liars lie from the word ‘Hello,’ and keep on lying. It’s a psychological problem where they feel they need to self- justify everything with a lie,” she said.

The addictive habit of lying makes it difficult for affected people to differentiate between the truth which is reality and falsehood which is unreal. The results are rejection, conflicts and the lack of opportunities because people do not trust you to handle responsibility.

Francine Umutoni, a 24 year old community worker relates with an experience where she was a victim of a lie spread by someone who hardly knew her.

"Lies aggravate relationships between friends, co-workers or a partner due to hurt feelings and distrust,” she said.

She recalls a time, three months ago when one of her close friends suddenly cut of communication with her.

"I later found out the reason behind this madness was a story he heard about me at a bar. Sadly he believed it, was very hurt and never wanted to speak to me or listen to reason,” Umutoni said.

For Umutoni, there was a lot to lose considering that telling lies is a high risk business that only takes away and leaves behind emptiness.

Currently, she is in a happy relationship with this gentleman whom she almost lost because of a useless lie.   

anyglorian@yahoo.com