Dear Aunt Silvia,

I am 25 years old. I have a girl friend of three years. Our relationship, however, according to me, has been thriving on lies more especially from me. It downed on me after the first year of our relationship that she did not have the qualities I needed in a woman.

I tried to show this to her but she is so much into me that she fears to let go of me because of the reasons I cannot tell. She has caught me red handed in the wrong several times but she just ignores everything and life goes on.

I have tried to tell her the truth but every time I do it, she cries for ages. We recently conflicted and showed her that I was quitting the whole thing, but she cried for three days non stop until she was hospitalized for a full week due to stomach ulcer complications.

I want us to part ways but again the thought of letting her suffer like that hurts me because I have never caught her in the wrong.

But surely I no longer love her and I don’t want to waste her time with me and she fails to get herself a future husband.  We are just not compatible.  Please advise me on how I can part ways with her without causing any harm.
Mr. P

Dear Mr.P,

There has never been an easy way to break a relationship, especially with a person whom you have been with for three years.

How can you be with a person for three years then wake up one morning and voila! Say you are least interested in her because she does not posses the qualities you are looking for in a woman of your dreams?

Dear Prince charming three years is a lot of time for a good girl to have wasted on you, truth be told, but you cut across to me as a very mean person.

I don’t mean to make you feel guilty about leaving your girlfriend, but you have to be considerate in whatever you want to do.  Just look at the past experiences, this girl was once hospitalized for a whole week when you threatened to leave her, what will she do to herself when you actually leave her?

She has a suicidal character; such a person must be handled with a lot of caution and care.

My piece of advice to you is if it is possible for you to go to another town or country, instead of just stopping the relationship abruptly and this person continues seeing you around with other women.

This can easily tempt this girl to do something beyond anyone’s imagination. Try to pull away from her gradually without hurting her feelings.

Even if you want to end a relationship, it is always adviseable to do it in the most humane manner as possible. But be warned, what goes around comes around!

Ends