It’s Not Easy Being Single at NUR

Emmanuel Musabyimana, a fourth-year agronomy student at the National University of Rwanda in Butare, can’t imagine life on campus without a girl by his side.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Walking side by side: Humanity made for companionship.

Emmanuel Musabyimana, a fourth-year agronomy student at the National University of Rwanda in Butare, can’t imagine life on campus without a girl by his side.

"The fact that a boy can’t find a girlfriend during his university life, I see something abnormal in him,” said Musabyimana, who has been dating his latest girlfriend for six months. Musabyimana isn’t the only one who thinks that way.

Ask most students at NUR, and they’ll tell you the same thing: if you’re single on campus, you’re a social outcast. You even get called names.

At NUR, those without a partner are universally referred to by the pejorative term "naïf.”

Couples say singles miss out on the fun of hanging out, going to restaurants, and watching movies in the Grand auditorium on campus together.

Eliane Umuhire, a third-year student in Accounting, said she can’t live without a boyfriend because she needs someone to share her life with.

"My boyfriend is a substitute for my parents while I’m here,” she said, smiling proudly.

"We share happiness and sadness.” Claude Uwimana is a first-year student in Social Sciences and has a girlfriend of one year.

"It’s obvious we came here first to study but you also need a girlfriend who can help you to relax after classes,” he said. Liliane Mugeni, a first-year Economics student, thinks the desire and pressure to have a partner is even stronger among female students.

"Personally, a boyfriend matters a lot in NUR,” she said.

"When you have a boyfriend at school, you stay calm and sheltered.  Men from outside don’t disturb you.”

Meanwhile, many of those who get called "naïf” say the pressure to couple up is silly. Viateur Musonera, a second-year student in Accounting and Sciences, said he is single and content.

"I’m in tranquillity because I don’t have a girlfriend,” he said.

"People who have girlfriends are not free and independent and they live a life that depends on someone else.”

Jean Baptiste Kamuhanda, a first-year Political Science student, is also single. He said that many students get boyfriends or girlfriends just for the sake of having a partner and the relationship ends up being superficial and based mostly on sex.

That, he added, leads to a lot of unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases. Kamuhanda said he wants no part of that.

"I’m proud,” he said, "to be called naïf.”

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