"The way we see the problem is the problem” - Stephen R. Covey. I once had a bad moment with one of my former bosses. Why? I thought I needed to speak my mind, to be heard that one time. I did not care really what happened after.

Yes, I did say it alright and walked out of the job by myself. A bad, difficult situation like that always involves personal conflicts and stress.

Once upset and defending or justifying yourself or your actions, things get worse. Know why? No one is listening. Everyone is fearful and defending their positions - even if they know they are wrong. 

And when the problem is a close relation or someone you see every day - it’s worth changing. All that you can change is you. Once you do, then everything will change.

When you’re in a difficult situation it’s hard not to believe you are stuck. When you think, "But it’s true - I have to deal with the fact that it’s happening to me,” then you are making it tough on yourself.Your problem is ONLY stuck BECAUSE you believe it is and that it has to be this way.

Once you change how you see it - it will change. Anything you want can be true. How? The "truth” changes as your attitude changes. Prove it to yourself.

Learn the simple trick of changing your mind - and you can change anything in your life for the better. I have come to learn that most times people are not against you - they are for themselves.

When others gossip, blame and judge others harshly they are reacting fearfully to old subconscious habit patterns. They "feel threatened” and so look for a cause and in blaming others - attempt to feel safe. You can help them to feel safe.

Scott a friend of mine used to tell me that you can’t ignore a bad situation: You are living in it. However, you can ignore the parts you fear or dislike in others and focus only on solutions instead.

Even if there are only a few good qualities in the others, giving only the good qualities your full attention will change everything. Your fear and dislike is bringing out the worst in them... you can change that quickly.

Forget the "past drama” and look for solutions.Sometimes it dont matter how you got into the bad situation - or what the details are. Ignore it -- as talking about it makes you feel bad and then you get more of it. Look for solutions.

Find something to like...no matter how small and enjoy it. It will really annoy the others at first...but once you really like them - and feel it -- they will change too. Once you are happy - it won’t matter, will it?

Alvin Toffler said that the illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn. Most of our relation problems are the result of our "habit of thinking” -- or an attitude we have about others and this situation.

If it doesn’t feel good: Fear is the reason. Overcome the fear that others can harm you - and you have solved your problem - for life!

You can only be happy and successful with good relations with others. Step by step, follow a good plan, take action every day.... open your mind to new ways of looking at the problem. You will find solutions.

Once you have a new attitude - then Law of Attraction will bring you new opportunities.Other’s change too. Magic happens. It’s all attracted to you by what you FEEL. Your feelings follow your thoughts - think new thoughts! No one can interfere with you.

No one controls what you tell yourself and think and feel. Other people are not the problem. Your Attention to them is the problem.

Change your Attitude. You’ll be open to a solution when you are really feeling hopeful and looking for one. There’s no end to bad situations and unpleasant people. Don’t go there.

No one can interfere with what you think ...and feel - so no one can interfere with your life and experience...unless YOU ATTRACT IT by arguing or blaming. Do you see the cycle? You can’t defend against what you are attracting, can you?

Time to change? Start with Yourself. Are you tempted to quit? Do you think finding a new job and new relations is the solution?

Think again. Make the changes in yourself first - after all: Wherever you go - there you are! You take yourself with you.

Might as well practice on the others in your current situation and change yourself. You will then turn this problem into a huge success.

How? Once you change, the new opportunities will begin to flow in. This is effortless change and fun. It’s not "against” anyone else. It’s moving to your most creative ideas. Focus on you Vision of a solution -- and feel it now - and it will soon be yours.

"The worst problems contain the best solutions - don’t quit till you find it.”

Ends