The first bouquet of flowers I received was in 2012, from a Prince Charming that was in my life back then. We were celebrating love on Valentine’s Day, and I can’t express enough how excited I was that day. He kept the tradition for as long as he could. What happened to him, you ask? His horse had an accident while braving the path to get closer to me. Those roads were so bad, bumpy, and treacherous back then.

I’ve always been fascinated by flowers. I find them so beautiful that my dream was to go into floriculture after graduation, unfortunately, that dream died of natural causes. I was rudely awakened by the world, even to this date, of the fact that I still can’t afford to be a proper, commercial florist.

I have a personal relationship with flowers and when I receive them, I just want to stare at them all day long, thanks to ‘working from home’. They spark that creativity that my boss has come to like while working from home, *wink wink*. They make my heart so joyful. I am also fortunate enough to have a wonderful human in my life who delights in making me happy, and one of the ways of course, is by sending me flowers spontaneously every now and then.

The strangest thing about the few times I have posted these beautiful plants on my WhatsApp status though, is that I receive congratulatory messages. It was very confusing at first until I realised that flowers commonly celebrate one’s birthday, graduation, engagement, and of course, Valentine’s Day. Imagine I don’t even want to receive flowers on lovers’ day anymore, because leaving alone the fact that they become a cliché on that day, they also become ridiculously overpriced and are likely to be in bad shape. Oh, I didn’t mention funerals because those are a bit different, and let’s be honest, those flowers at the funeral give off zero happiness.

Recently when I received a bouquet from the office, it was amusingly hard to explain and convince my WhatsApp audience that they just came through as a greeting, or a ‘checking on you’ gesture. Apparently, my flowers survived being handed to an honourable guest who was coincidentally visiting that day as a ‘welcome gift’. I was so humoured by this but I also imagined how awkward that conversation would have gone, trying to get my flowers back, because believe you me, I would have asked for my flowers back:

"I’m sorry ma’am but those are actually mine. They were accidentally handed to you.” The guest would have disliked me for life, that’s for sure.

So why aren’t flowers commonly given as gifts? Are they so expensive or ‘ni ibintu by’abazungu’ as well? Or would you rather receive a burger or a pair of doughnuts than plants that are going to dry up soon anyway? I know their life-span is short but the joy that they bring lasts really long, they add a beautiful aroma to the room, and even add to your life span in the long run. Oh, also you can actually dry and store them for memory, plus they won’t make you fat.

I tried growing house plants so that I can have flowers to look at every once in a while, but unfortunately, some dried up, others were over watered so they drowned and died. A ‘frenemy’ even once asked me if I wasn’t a witch in my former life (LOL much) because apparently when ‘western’ witches walk through a garden, it dries up. I have now learned to look up the plants online, on their vulnerability and/or independence before I invest in them.

Anyway, I hope we learn to brighten people’s days with flowers from time to time without necessarily waiting for their birthdays, graduations or engagements. Some guy from the office insisted that guys should be sent flowers too (LOL), I don’t know about that bit but if it makes them happy, why not? The point is to purchase a bouquet (doesn’t have to be 100 stems) for our special ones especially when they’re unwell, having a rough week, mourning or even celebrating a milestone as ‘small’ as moving out of their parents’ house to finally be responsible adults.

The writer is Rwanda’s first female saxophonist.