For my last two years at the University, I worked as a cordinator of a program in a certain project. A typical assignment had me creating and presenting a customized training and development program. I worked hard on these projects, conducted some first-rate training and was almost well paid for my efforts.

Along side my work I came into contact with lots of other projects, institutions and organisations with loads of programs and interacted with lots of the professional’s involved in doing almost smilar work. They all poured in loads of efforts and time that were well received in their work.

The problem was their efforts had little or no impact. It was very easy to blame one self. Over time, however, one discoveres that the problem wasn’t you. It had to do with the very nature of "soft skills.In the world of work, "hard skills” are technical or administrativeprocedures related to an organization’s core business.

Examples include machine operation, computer protocols, safety standards, financial procedures and sales administration. These skills are typically easy to observe, quantify and measure. They’re also easy to train, because most of the time the skill sets are brand new to the learner and no unlearning is involved.

By contrast, "soft skills” (also called "people skills”) are typically hard to observe, quantify and measure.People skills are needed for everyday life as much as they’re needed for work.

They have to do with how people relate to each other: communicating, listening, engaging in dialogue, giving feedback, cooperating as a team member, solving problems, contributing in meetings and resolving conflict.

Leaders at all levels rely heavily on people skills: setting an example, team building, facilitating meetings, encouraging innovation,solving problems, making decisions, planning,delegating, observing, instructing, coaching, encouraging and motivating.

Obviously, people come to organisations with interpersonal behavior patterns already thoroughly ingrained, and they weren’t learned in a classroom.

Instead, individuals learn how to deal with relationships and other life challenges "on the street” at a very early age. They observe how the people around them do things, they experiment, and they stick with what works for them.

So everyone ends up with a unique portfolio of people skills; some behaviors may be effective, but others cause problems. By the time employees get to a training room, they’ve already worked hard for decades to reinforce the way they deal with people.

Introducing a new interpersonal skill is extremely difficult, because it means replacing the old skill. The brain may be an information processor, but it doesn’t work like a digital computer.

There is no "delete” key for unwanted programs. Any new pattern, even one that makes sense, even one that is desired and expected, will seem extremely awkward. The only way to replace an old pattern will be to establish a new one that gets better results.

If this new pattern proves to be more satisfying than the old pattern, and if there’s an adequate period of reinforcement, there’s a chance that new connections will establish themselves.

Without this reinforcement, however, the pathways will not establish themselves, and most people will predictably fall back on the old, comfortable patterns they grew up with.

Unfortunately, this disappointing scenario happens more often than not. An organization invests heavily in a people skills training program, and yet there’s no plan for reinforcement in place, and the intervention fails to have the hoped-for result.

There is virtually no return on the investment. The money is mostly wasted.Without reinforcement, even people who want to change are likely to return to their comfortable patterns, and so dysfunctional behaviors remain the same.

If this happens too often, employees may come to feel cynical about people skills programs. The only thing that can create permanent behavioral change is frequent reinforcement over the long term.

If someone who truly desires to change an interpersonal behavior is supported by a knowledgeable coach’s ongoing encouragement, new patterns can be established.

The most useful perspective on people skills training is that it’s an essential first step—a necessary "introduction” to the right way of doing things.

After that, ongoing reinforcement of desired behaviors has to be there. When a newly trained individual returns to a workplace, he or she needs knowledgeable coworkers to give ongoing feedback, guidance and encouragement.

Even our bosses should start to work on their own people skills, hence establish the right expectations and coach their managers.Basically the top-down approach.

With an environment of support, encouragement and reinforcement, an organization can achieve the desired return on a considerable investment in people skills training.

But executives really have to want it to make the right kind of investment. There’s no magic pill—no short cut. It’s like losing weight.

If you really want to keep the pounds off, you have to establish new eating and exercise habits. If you want lasting changes in your organization, you have to be willing to pay the price.

Ends