Over the past two to three decades, a theory has been floating around and gained significant popularity: "live your own life”. Lifestyle experts have shared insights across various platforms on how important it is to live one’s own life, ways to lead one’s own life, why you should take time off and lead your own life, and so on, However, the basic theme remains; "lead your own life”.
People seem to have been significantly influenced by it. Women often complain about routine domestic tasks such as cooking and cleaning for the family, expressing a lack of time for themselves, even if they might not have an interest in pursuing anything else.
I remember an old instance. A neighbour had a young baby, around 10 months old. Naturally, caring for a baby of that age involves constant, never-ending tasks throughout the day. She would often lament, "There’s so much to do, I can barely find time for myself.” However, my mother disagreed with her complaints and remarked, "In the end, you are doing all this for your own baby and family, so why should you complain?”
Men too complain about their work, saying it takes up too much time and that they do not find much time for themselves. But this work is for their own benefit, is it not? So many instances can be quoted from around us.
But the key issue is, is it possible for all individuals to "lead their own lives” i.e. do exclusively what they want and when they want to do so? If so, it would lead to chaos. Every person in society is dependent on another. Any work done by a person, whether a casual labourer, businessperson, or skilled professional, benefits somebody else.
A grocer sells groceries for food preparation, a banker assists with managing money, an electrician fixes electrical issues, a medic provides healing, a teacher educates and mentors young individuals, etc. Working for one’s family members contributes to the overall well-being of the family.
Most individuals also have other interests, such as music, sports, reading, etc. However, except for a few, they usually pursue these activities only in their leisure time. The minority who fully dedicate themselves to their passion, focusing solely on one such activity, often achieve financial gain, recognition, and acclaim for it.
Imagine the scenario, if a banker stops working, medic stops treating, milkmen stop supplying milk to dairies, it will cause inconvenience to so many people around, dependent on them. These persons would also lose money and instead of enjoying, "living their own life”, would become tense and try to restart the work they were doing.
Imagine a situation where a banker halts work, a medic ceases treatment, and milkmen stop supplying milk. This disruption would inconvenience many who rely on them, leading to financial losses and a shift from "living their own life” to a state of tension as they strive to resume their usual activities.
When someone suggests "live your own life,” it may imply that your current way of living is burdensome. This isn’t a very healthy notion.
Whatever one does is for the well-being of oneself and society. There are others working for one’s benefit too. Therefore, instead of worrying about not being able to "live life as desired”, it is recommended to find joy in one’s current pursuits.
Instead of thinking of it as "mere work to be done”, it can be thought of as "doing something useful for all”. Focus on it and strive to improve on that. Other activities are just a light diversion to refresh. Such an attitude would make the work done seem more pleasurable and the routine one follows, from morning to evening, is part of life and should be enjoyed as such.
Dr Rachna Pande is a specialist in internal medicine.