The recent easing of the lockdown made it possible for us to catch up with friends that we had not seen for long. On a cool Sunday evening I went to Kimironko to meet Gasana because there was a lot for us to share. The conversation this time centered on the people we let around and into our lives. The ones we call as soon as we get an idea, even before we start working on it.
It so happened that a few days before this sit down, songstress Juliana Kanyomozi had announced the arrival of her new born child. Amidst the millions of congratulatory messages, the former Tusker Project Fame judge was bombarded with questions about the father of the child and why she had kept such news to herself. People wondered how someone of her stature managed to keep that under wraps for nine months. How is that possible in this day and age?
My friend Gasana applauded Juliana’s move saying even when we think a public figure should have their life all out for everyone to see, it is possible for one to decide what will be seen and known and what will not. These days it is like an abomination to buy new clothes and not take a photo for social media. It is a crime for us to cry without posting it somewhere.
Juliana quoted author Khalil Gibran on her social media, ‘Travel and tell no one, live a true love story and tell no one, live happily and tell no one. People ruin beautiful things.’ We have heard of the saying work in silence, it is because work done in silence stands to achieve much more than the noisy one whose agenda could be showing off or making someone feel jealous. A few years ago a celebrity couple got married and from the photos and videos, the bride seemed to be sending a message to both her exes and the man’s exes, it was obvious to anyone watching that this was done to spite the masses. Well that need was met, the videos and photographs still exist but the ‘love’ faded and marriage ended within a year.
Regardless of the pressure, it is possible for us to keep some things to ourselves. I would not beret anyone that throws all out here for anyone that is interested, because I do too, maybe not that much but hey, I have succumbed to the pressure to post a picture or two a week.
A lady I have known for the last five years was honest with me about protecting her space and family. Her home is a sanctuary and she is very careful who she opens doors to because in her own words, ‘there are enemies we know and those we don’t know. One can never be too sure who wishes them well or who is capable of harming them.’
There is someone in constant fights with her siblings who feel she lives lavishly as the siblings struggle through life. It is not her intention to make anyone feel inferior but it has happened. A brother feels like the sister should support him based on what she posts on social media yet the reality is different, she hardly has anything to spare.