"Feedback is the breakfast of champions,” said Ken Blanchard, US writer.

"Examine what is said and not who speaks” (African proverb)

"Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care for people will hear them and be influenced by them for good or ill” (Buddha)

In the last Leading Rwanda column on February 25, we focused on the importance of inclusion, recognition and belonging and one of the best ways for leaders to put these noble ideas into action is through the feedback that they give (and receive).

"Feedback - the act of sharing your observations with others, especially with your direct reports, about their work performance for the purpose of helping them improve and become more productive - is important,” says Stella Wayianzuvuko, Faculty Development Coordinator at the Akilah campus of Davis College here in Kigali.

She explains why: "Feedback differs from other communication at work because it is intentional for the purpose of making the receiver grow in their professional capacity and inspires them to perform highly.”

So why is there so much resistance to giving (and receiving) such feedback?

"Most people feel intimidated when it comes to giving feedback. Most people are afraid of being misinterpreted or even fear to create tension between them and the ones they give feedback to,” Stella says.

There could also be a cultural factor here in Rwanda and other countries.

"In some places, it is not a common practice and that is why people shy away from it not knowing that the benefits are immense not only for the company but also for your own personal professional growth,” Stella adds.

And many people associate feedback with the often dreaded annual performance review, which can elicit a whole host of other concerns about such things as timing, inconsistency, quality, incompetence, trust and consequences.

So what is the antidote to this resistance and these concerns, especially in relation to the formal performance review process?

It is very simple: give (and invite) feedback informally, regularly and constructively.

As well as helping people feel recognized and engaged, it helps to build trust and loyalty, it helps deal with any urgent issues or problems right away and it makes the formal performance feedback and appraisal process much easier and less stressful (assuming that managers take notes along the way).

Ideally, this kind of feedback should be scheduled. Maybe a five-minute, one-on-one conversation or update every Friday afternoon. And then a longer, more strategic chat every month.

And yet some of the most effective feedback can also be shared while drinking coffee, walking to a meeting or being stuck in traffic.

All informal feedback is not equal though.

Many of us fear the sudden outburst from an angry manager: "You’re an idiot. How could you do that?!”

But research has actually shown that most people would prefer to receive such negative feedback that none at all. "At least you know what your manager thinks of you if he says it out loud. Silence gives you no clue,” says one manager, who prefers to remain anonymous.

Other feedback can actually be well-meant but not much use. "You did a great job” can make an employee feel good for a few minutes but it would help much more to say how and why you thought she did a great job.

So, instead of unhelpful outbursts, silence or platitudes, leaders should give timely and specific feedback.

Some of this will be "corrective”, which Stella says is "intended to help subordinates change their strategies when the current ones are not working.”

For example, a sales manager might give her associate some corrective feedback and developmental "feedforward”: "I noticed that you were a little quick to start quoting prices with that prospective client. In future, you may want to hold off and discuss it with me and your colleagues first.”

This kind of feedback should not be limited to a manager telling a subordinate what to do.

"A subordinate can also give feedback to their supervisor. This is always true when the two have a good working relationship,” Stella says, adding: "There is also feedback to colleagues, which fosters teamwork.”

So, in summary, Stella recommends that current and future leaders:

1.       Create rapport with their direct reports first

2.       Give feedback frequently and not just as a one-time thing

3.       Identify the right situation to give any feedback

4.       Have realistic expectations about the likely results from the feedback

5.       Ensure that the feedback is not one way by allowing the direct report to be part of the discussion

If you want to comment on this column or any other related issue, please email the columnist directly at: jeremy@jeremysolomons.com.