Dear Aunt Silvia,

I am a married mother of five children. I have a young sister who has been married for three years now but childless. Something is seriously disturbing her because it looks like she has lost the meaning of life. My maternal family has a history of depression and suicide.

Most of the time my sister is hysterical, refuses to eat and cries herself to sleep. I am wondering if these could be signs of depression and a possible suicide attempt. Please help me help my sister.
Georgina.

Dear Georgina,

Depression is now among the fast killer diseases because the pain is cumulative, ever present, and without end. It affects a person’s very being, their essence, their soul, and they may embrace death to end that which seems to have no end in life.

The first step for her to take is to know the cause of her depression; because there is a certain comfort gained when we latch on to a cause of our depression; when she identifies that then there is a possibility of a cure.

A depressed person will most times want to talk about their life problems. They may want you to confirm their negative view of life and at the same time can be very manipulative, needy, and demanding.

There is much time and effort exerted trying to solve their problems and when they become exhausted and realize that there is no solution they become further depressed.

It will be very easy for you to be sucked into this spiral of emotions to the benefit of neither you nor your depressed sister.

Their problems might be horrendous and unsolvable at this time, but for now the most pressing problem in their life is the depression, this is especially true if they are having suicidal thoughts.

Be careful not to delve too deep into these issues, they are best left to a competent therapist to investigate. I only suggest you touch on these issues in order to show that therapy will be beneficial in helping to sort out these complex problems.

What must be done most times is to counter to what the depressed emotions dictate. In the process of helping your sister don’t forget to involve her spouse, because you might end up dealing with her alone yet you have your own house hold duties to attend to and a family for that matter.

Let her spouse be on the fore front in helping her get out of this depression and suicide attempt. That is why when things get out of control, she will need the advice and counsel of a competent and caring therapist.

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