I have come across negative people and trust me, I wouldn’t want to stay close to them for so long. All they’ve to say is bad news, or ruin the happy moments. Their answer is always "No you can’t”, "are you sure you will manage?” and many daunting comments. They cannot challenge themselves due to fear of failure or what people would think of them.
They abort dreams, as they never give you a chance to exercise your abilities. In 2016, I was so ready to apply for my Masters’ Scholarship just immediately after accomplishing my Bachelor’s degree, when I informed one of my friends about my idea, I thought she would be excited for me, what are friends for anyway? To my dismay, she put off the good moment.
She said, "Haven’t you seen people with Master’s degrees roaming from one office to another applying for jobs but in vain. I believe a Bachelor’s degree is enough, by the way, most bosses are not even over qualified, what if you apply for a job and you are more qualified than your boss, will you hook that job?”
She went on and on. Whatever word she spoke was negative. I froze for a moment. I felt agitated. Why did I even think she would be happy and proud of me in the first place? She never said anything positive.
That day, I went to bed thinking maybe she was right. But when I thought twice, it hit my mind that such people only bring doom and when you spend much time with them, you become one of them.
Negative people are always full of excuses, they never move outside their comfort zones, they are thus never able to try out new experiences, even when they give a positive comment, it is always accompanied by " but”.
For instance, "you are too smart but your shoes seem so old”, I love your kind of job but I don’t think they pay you much money,” "your boyfriend is cute but he is short.” Those are their compliments. Negative people usually think they are not smart enough, or good enough.
Come to think of it, those who are negative can never talk about future plans or projects in a positive way. They hardly chat about plans because they are too enfolded in their current gloom.
A negative person can barely identify joy, passion, serenity and exhilaration; they are merely unable to produce any positive energy and might fascinate your attention. They tend to whine a lot, thinking that the whole world is against them.
Sometimes negativity grows according to how one was raised, at times, it could be due to exposure to negativity at an early age, or failure, low self-esteem, much love for attention, to some people, it is how they interpret the world, yet to others, it is a habit.
Negativity can have a consequence in your life, for example; relationships, success, health, and happiness. It squeezes one in to an apathetic corner to go after what they want in life, thus hindering them to get a life they wish to have.
Negative attitude also drains the energy from other people, this kills relationships, it is the creator of stress, and might affect your mental health.
However, the good news is, it is not too late to change. Learn to test yourself to carry out tasks that you thought you wouldn’t- surround yourself with positive people- stop dwelling on the impossible side and hope for the best. Learn to express gratitude and make accurate judgments.
You can also develop new habits such as; working on your personal growth, starting to live in the moment, forgetting and forgiving of your past. Move on!
editor@newtimesrwanda.com