My numerous visits to several foreign countries and recently to my last country of residence provided a vivid reminder of the façade of living in the northern hemisphere – a lifelong dream, or rather an obsession of many of those around us, especially our youth.

Many individuals here in the region have expressed a fervent desire to emigrate to Europe, North America, or anywhere away from Africa, to enjoy, as they say, a better life. Our conversations often reveal that they have not previously travelled, and are under skilled and adamantly indifferent to the realities, personal cost, sacrifices and risks.

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I am part of this story from the opposite side of the dreamer. In January this year, a member of my household abandoned the family and surreptitiously disappeared while on a visitor’s visa in Canada although she has always artistically expressed the profound pride of being African: Africa Nyumbani. Is a scarcity mindset responsible for such solipsism and betrayal?

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On July 18, 2017, a similar occurrence happened in the US when six youths from Burundi disappeared after the First Global Robotics Challenge concluded. Organizers have said the disappearance was "self-initiated". This is an embarrassment to all peoples of this continent.

In the last few years, the doors to asylum seekers, disingenuous visitors, and other immigrant classes, are firmly being shut to those of the developing world using different methods - physical walls, deportation, policies and legislation. Based on my personal experiences, this article compels a candid examination of the realities in the Promised Land and its illusions.

In 2018, Donald Trump’s executive order and proposed EU policies on asylum seekers testify to this reality – including the recently well-publicized deportation of asylum seekers to Rwanda by the British government. First world nations want "economic and educated” immigrants to build their societies – not liabilities. The juxtaposition of addressing the problem of ageing demographics by increased immigration in northern countries and the realities of racism and discrimination is overlooked by most people and ignored by governments.

Language barriers, education, marriages, family commitments and harsh weather, do not matter to the dreamers. Material comforts and the fantasies of living abroad prevail over everything. TV programming, movies, social media, music videos, and Instagram postings of chosen images from friends and relatives abroad, seem to have an Ericksonian effect.

But the dream is nourished even further. Those who return for family visits, including finding a local bride, inform the background scenery. Designer clothing, rented cars, iPhones, jewellery, stylish travel luggage, electronic gadgets, apparent endless reserves of foreign currency and other trimmings indicative of financial success make a lasting and convincing impression that living abroad is a great personal accomplishment and that you have become a successful person - "a somebody”.

While there, I have witnessed the phenomenon of the elusive dreams shortly after the blissful arrival. Many are embarrassed to let those at home know their dreams have now become an albatross; it’s a one-way ticket. Many secretly wish to return home but cannot, for different reasons – pride and embarrassment, economic hardship, no family residence and no employment opportunities. Many of these individuals appear at foreign immigration offices eager for that visa status change or extension, work permit or permanent resident card – in pursuit of the inzozi. Marriages of convenience to get foreign residency papers through spousal sponsorship are not uncommon.

The euphoria of arrival is quickly replaced with reality: finding legitimate employment, accepting equality (no umugaragu), loneliness, adapting to another culture, food and language. Social media postings abruptly stop.

Samuel Selvon’s novel, The Lonely Londoners, reflects on the chilly welcome given to the early Caribbean immigrants to the city of London in the 1950s; they became a target of racial hatred and xenophobia, and were also at the receiving end of hasty anti-immigration legislation in parliament – not unlike what is happening in Europe today. They were unable to return to their island communities and became a source of cheap labour. We see a remarkable repeat of these events today.

We should not expect self-gratification from the toil and sacrifices made by others over decades then moved to vexation when we experience social stratification, loneliness, nostalgia, rejection and hardship. The material thirst is short-lived. The bubble bursts. What happens next? Time, effort and sacrifices were made to get to the Promised Land and now another cycle begins? The African continent is experiencing above average growth.

After Asia, Africa dominates the list of the world's 20 fastest-growing economies in 2024.

Why not contribute to its progress as others did in their Promised Land unless you wish to take a short-cut at the expense of others and just pay lip service to Africa Nyumbani?

Sheik Mia is the CEO of Quantum Solutions Limited, a writer and musician.