Evaluate your own behaviour
Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Dear Counsellor,

My English teacher is always picking on me. She uses every chance she gets to humiliate me in front of other students and it is really starting to get to me. Last week she made jokes about me during the entire lesson and she said I would never amount to anything.  I pass her subject fairly well but she doesn’t seem to like me. What can I do?  Pius -----

Every child deserves love, security and care from educators because teachers play an important role in students’ academic journey throughout the formal schooling experience. Healthy relationships between teachers and students can be extremely beneficial at all levels of educational establishment, from improved self-esteem to increased class engagement and performance. This is because, when teachers form positive bonds with students, classrooms become supportive spaces in which students can engage academically and socially. However, school can be difficult if you have a teacher that seems to dislike you. Technically, it’s illegal and unprofessional for a teacher to show signs of resentment to a student and I am sorry that you’re going through this situation. Conversely, sometimes teachers don’t actually hate you, but have unresolved issues with you that need to be fixed. Don’t give your teacher a reason not to like you, rather, evaluate your own behaviour and figure out why your teacher seems to dislike you. Do you talk back to your teacher? Do you distract your other classmates? Are you constantly restless in class often interrupting the on-going lessons? Or is your general conduct disrespectful to your teacher?

Don’t give your teacher a hard time, and she’ll most likely stop giving you a hard time. If you realise that your actions are not appropriate, then you need to acknowledge your wrongdoings and the negative impact that your actions have caused. First, you need to show remorse to your teacher for your actions. Approach your teacher for a private talk and express your feelings about how this unhealthy relationship is affecting your classroom performance and self-esteem and that you’re ready to do everything possible to fix this relationship. You must be genuine with your apology, and make a conscious effort to completely avoid repeating similar actions in the future.

Similarly, put more effort into your schoolwork. Teachers like students who do well in tests, hand in their homework assignments, and participate in group projects. If she sees that you’re putting effort into your academic work she’ll appreciate your effort. You and your teacher should be able to work together in a stress-free environment. However, if you try everything possible to fix this relationship with her and you still feel bullied, scared, or hurt by your teacher, it is important that you talk to the principal, school counsellor or your parents, as they will likely effect change.  It would also help to have statements of other trustworthy students who can back you up. The reason is that a single complaint against a teacher is not taken as seriously as multiple complaints. Tell them with evidence that you tried talking to the teacher in the most respectful manner and nothing has changed.  These authorities have the mandate to protect your wellbeing at school and are responsible for disciplinary measures against teachers’ inappropriate behaviours. Chances are that there could be an intervention for your good. 

Their thoughts...

Patrick Muhizi, Student

For this situation not to escalate into something that will affect your studies, take the high road and approach your teacher, talk to her calmly about the problem. Find her in her free time and have a conversation regarding what happens in class. It will help you understand the issue and possibly solve it. ------

Samuel Mugisha, university student You are a student and you deserve to be treated like other students. In my opinion, if you believe you are being treated unfairly, please talk to the dean of studies and let him handle the situation professionally. -----

Bonheur Niyonkuru, Student Don’t hesitate to speak out. Keeping silent about your teacher’s unethical behaviour towards you in class will only will lead to more problems, and you might end up hating her subject, and this will affect your studies. Talk to the leader of students about it or even another teacher you are free with. Don’t let this situation continue. ------

Laurier Mugisha, Student Perhaps you need to change your attitude towards your teacher. Teachers often pick on students but in most cases it doesn’t mean they hate those particular students. Look at the situation from another angle; you might not the only one she picks on in class. Reflect on your own behaviour and find out why she chooses to pick on you.