Josiane Umulinga grew up in a big family of nine children with both of her parents.

She describes her life before the 1994 Genocide against the Tutsi as that which was always cheerful and contented, with family and friends surrounding her.

"Our home was always busy due to constant visitors. At times, especially during school holidays, we would fill the floor with mattresses like in boarding schools so as to accommodate guests,” she narrates, adding that this experience taught her the true meaning of love and sharing whatever little one has.

However, Umulinga had no idea her joyful childhood would come to a screeching halt, suddenly. While she was about to turn 15, the genocide began and claimed her mother and five siblings.

During the time, her father and one of her sisters had sought refuge in neighbouring Burundi, while another sibling of hers met a good Samaritan who fled with her to the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC), where they lived as refugees before returning home.

As for Umulinga, she was moving from place to place for her survival, together with her young sister and uncle, both of whom were lucky to survive the imaginable horrors of the genocide.

"It’s been thirty years, but I still remember my family vividly, and I must say I am grateful for their memory since I know some survivors who can’t recall even the smallest details of their loved ones,” she narrates.

Having lost her mother, five siblings and other family members whom she dearly loved, Umulinga says that life after the genocide was filled with numerous challenges.

However, she says she is convinced the hardships were a divine path leading to her destiny of preaching the gospel of forgiveness, which is why she wrote her book ‘Survived to forgive’.

"My father, who survived the genocide but later died, would always encourage my remaining siblings and I to write about our tragic experience. I am happy that I have honoured his wish,” she observed during the book launch in Nairobi early this week.

On why she decided to forgive those who mercilessly killed her family members, the author recalls the last words of her mother before her untimely demise, where she told her "Run and pray, run and pray”. She says praying has been her solace place, and through it she learned that forgiveness doesn’t free the wrongdoer, but rather the wronged.

"Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness, nor is it a form of condoning or excusing harmful behaviour. It is a way to free ourselves from the shackles of resentment and anger. I chose to cultivate my pain to harvest my destiny,” she explains.

The survivor, now a mother of three, also acknowledges that forgiveness is a complex and deeply personal process, underlining that there are no easy solutions or quick fixes. However, she asserts that "it is possible to find healing, even in the darkest of times.”

Fighting genocide denial

Meanwhile, during the book launch, Benon Karisa, a diplomat at the Rwanda High Commission in Kenya who was representing the High Commissioner at the event urged genocide survivors to recount their unspeakable horrors through books and other documentations, noting that it is a valuable contribution in the fight against genocide denial and revisionism.

"Genocide perpetrators and their sympathisers have embarked on the last stage of genocide, which is denial. The best way to counter this vice is to document such real-life experience during our country’s dark history, and this is a collective responsibility,” he stressed.

He also reminded that the genocide did not happen abruptly as genocide deniers claim, noting that it was planned for years by the genocidal government whose sole target was to exterminate the Tutsi. Its strategic execution would later claim a million innocent lives in just a hundred days.

A resilient nation

As Rwanda prepares to commemorate the 30th anniversary of the 1994 Genocide against the Tutsi, Kenyan officials who were at the book launch event hailed the country’s remarkable progress over the years, commending its visionary leadership.

"We need to thank the leadership of Rwanda for the courage and strength that have created a country which is becoming a shining jewel in Africa. We learn a lot from Rwanda and her people, that you can live with your adversary when you forgive. It is through all these attributes that the country has made significant leaps,” said Kimutai Keitany, an official at the Office of the President of Kenya.

Moreover, Hassan Omar Hassan, a Kenyan politician who is a member of the East African Legislative Assembly (EALA) also made the same observation, underlining that Rwanda is a beacon of unity and resilience, and that oneness should be the spirit of East African member states and the entire continent.

"This is how we will overcome our immense challenges as a region and a continent,” he said.

Among other dignitaries at the event was Senator Halake Abshiro, a member of the Kenyan Senate.