So you thought I had gone to join the pirates huh? Think again. I had to give it a second thought before I could die on the sea, bearing in mind the vigilance  of a superpower called the USA policing the area.

It looks like everybody is envious of how these boys are making easy dollars when economies the world over are collapsing like a game of cards.

Much as I want to do away with this biting poverty, I deserve to do so in more honorable ways so that I could get a hounourable funeral when I die, not my body vanishing into the waters.

So I decided to relocate to Kigali my motherland so as to  try engaging in other ways of making  legit money  than by grabbing people’s sea vessels.

As usual I had to book into one of those Kigali bound buses and damn it , the fares were so high. Anyway, Xmas is around the corner, so I had to part with the 30k or pay 35k the following  day.

Like I always do and as all men do, I looked up for a beautiful name to book next to. I was told names tell a lot about their owners. So Monica looked pretty cute and I had to book next to her.

I was right on time to get to my seat before a maniac (they always do) emerged from now where, to claim my seat. She wasn’t there yet, therefore I could be reading a newspaper as my mind told me that she was supposed to give me company for the next 8 hours to come.

She stealthily walked in as I was engrossed in the newspaper. As she fumbled to get to her seat with a baby tucked on her back complete with extra baggage around her, a baby bag dropped on my lap as I also fumbled with words asking her whether she happened to be the real owner of the seat.

She was the  ‘Monica’. To my surprise she seemed the typical mturage’s house wife. I resigned to the fact that my planned ride to Kigali City would not be as good as I had imagined. However I gave myself a consolation that at least if the baby didn’t cry or if she didn’t have to do the pampers, all would be well.

The Poor baby started crying, as I guess  hunger pangs started biting it. As soon as the bus stopped, I hopped out to look for UHT milk. I was nearly left behind by  bus as it took me some time before I could get a shop.

After getting back in my seat , I had to pour the milk into the bottle and as she fed her, I had to carry the bags. Soon Mama wanted to go for a short call, so I had to do the baby sitting.

‘Ariko ahari ubanza ukunda abaana’ (I guess you love kids) she asked, ‘Why would I hate them?’ I retorted. To actually test my truthfulness the baby went ahead and peed on me. I was now pissed off.

At the border, I had to do all the documentation .I ran upon this old friend whom I met on bus who  asked  me about the time I had gotten married. At Rwagitima, she got off and thanked me for my generosity.

I was like ‘Your damn right, as you have put my parenting skills to full test Mum.’

Contact: kagire_eddie@yahoo.com