My teacher and friend, Dr. Jean Watson, writes, "The person has one basic struggle: to actualize the real self, thereby developing the spiritual essence of the self, and in the highest sense to become more god-like.” This sounds like a tall order but it is a shared aspect of humanity; something we all know to be true. Each experience brings some lesson, some deeper understanding of ourselves. And with each lesson comes a higher knowing of who we really are. All of life keeps us striving toward that moment of truth that rests in self-knowledge. Isn’t that funny? We spend our entire lives working and toiling simply to know who we are.

So if the real self is the spirit, the essence of the Divine that lies in each one of us, could it be that our entire purpose on the planet is to reconnect with that ideal? To know and understand our true identity?To peel back the layers of confusion and sadness and fear to reveal the truth? It might just be. What a surprise – and a relief – to know that purpose of life isn’t financial success or professional accomplishment! It is actually so much simpler than that. It is just to know oneself. And to live in the peace that comes with that knowing.

This work requires that we understand what we are not. We are not the anger we hold onto or the resentment that keeps us from inner peace. We aren’t the self-doubt that keeps us from realizing our dreams or the anxiety that keeps us in our place. And we certainly are not the sadness or grief or fear that we think we’ve become in the face of life’s circumstances. We are not our thoughts and we are not our opinions. We are something much bigger and more complex. We are something sacred.

A Course in Miracles says again and again that whatever is not fear is love. Well, if we are not fear – could we be love? Could the "real self,” the spirit, the soul, be love? Well, let’s think about it this way: if we didn’t insist upon holding grudges, forming judgments about ourselves and others, and surrendering to patterns of shame and guilt, what would be left? Love. If there wasn’t some great struggle we kept battling with the world day in and day out, what would remain? Love. And if we trusted that, no matter what, we were supported, guided, and safe, what would we live for? Love.

And what does this have to do with health? The healing power of love has been shown to be affiliated with human thriving. And the absence of love – those places where fear, anger, guilt, and shame reside –are associated with the development of dis-ease and increased stress within the mind and body, cancer, heart disease, and a host of other ailments.Take a moment to think about what you’re striving for in life. Remember who you are.

Billy Rosa is a Registered Nurse, Integrative Nurse Coach Visiting Faculty, University of Rwanda