Winnie Byanyima, the Executive Director of Oxfam International is a leader on women’s rights, democratic governance and peace building.
Winnie Byanyima, the Executive Director of Oxfam International is a leader on women’s rights, democratic governance and peace building.
She is married to Dr Kizza Besigye, but does not want to be addressed by her husband’s name. "…And my name is Winnie Karagwa Byanyima, full stop.” A follower had in his tweet referred to her as "Winnie Byanyima Besigye.”
Many of her followers questioned why any woman would distance herself from the husband’s name.
The tweet has since generated a lot of debate on social media in relation to the question of whether a woman should take on the husband’s maiden name after marriage.
For Dorah Manzi who has been married two years, taking on her husband’s name was a sign of deep love for him. "When I got married, I took on my husband’s name because I felt that it was a gesture that would create a deeper bond between us, and indeed, I feel like we are one,” Manzi says.
She argues that by accepting to start a family with someone, taking up his name should be ok.
Pastor Liz Bitorwa of Women Foundation Ministries agrees with Manzi, and calls it an issue of choice.
She observes that there is no scripture in the bible that forces a woman to take up her husband’s name but is quick to add that there is also no harm if a woman decides to do it.
She says that since the man is the head of the family, taking up his name is a good gesture and also a sign of respect that can on the other hand make the bond between a man and his wife stronger.
"When two people get married, they become one and I don’t see any harm in deciding to take up your husband’s name,” Bitorwa says.
Robert Mugabe a Kigali based lawyer is of the view that taking on a spouse’s name while married, is out of choice not obligation.
"Taking on the name of your spouse helps one to identify with the family tree of the other, but it’s not that there is something special about it. The gesture has a lot to do with family pride and it kind of gives you the notion that there is commitment and a sense of belonging,” Mugabe adds.
For Leila Karangwa, taking on your husband’s name shouldn’t be such a big deal, and finds it unnecessary.
"There is just so little that is lost when one doesn’t change her name, to me, I think if one is married, that’s respectful enough, there is no need of going as far as name changing,” she says.
But Solomon Mugabo disagrees, arguing that taking on a spouse’s name is something so simple that shouldn’t cause alarm, as long as it is mutually consented.
He gives an example of a play by Shakespeare where an actor mentioned that a rose by any other name would still smell as sweet; therefore a name is just a name and doesn’t change who the person is to you.
Scovia Karungi is a married woman. She says that most women choose to take their spouse’s last name when they get married, and she finds absolutely nothing wrong with it especially if both parties agree.
That is treating women like property owned by men
For Alice Nirere, the custom of a wife taking the husband’s maiden name in a way signifies that a woman is a man’s property.
"Certain customs have been removed and society has transformed, but this one still remains. I wish women who loathe the idea could stand up for themselves and not accept changing their names for men who end up not even respecting them,” Nirere says.
According to Sociology Professor Amber Paulk, women taking their husband’s name has a deep historical background.
"When you look back at the history of marriage as an institution, women were considered property,” Paulk said in an online article. "They were moving from a father’s home to a husband’s home. It would make total sense for them to take their husband’s name.”
The meaning behind women being property extends to the type of structure a culture has. Male-dominated cultures have been the most common throughout history, Paulk said.
"Most cultures were founded with a patriarchal structure where men dominated the economics,” Paulk said. "It’s fairly recent that women have been able to change positions in society.
In the Journal of Economic Perspectives (2004) ‘Making a Name: Women’s Surnames at Marriage and Beyond’ Claudia Goldin and Maria Shim write that since the 90s there has been an increase in the number of women who keep their surnames after marriage. The increase is far easier to explain: Women began to "make a name” for themselves and more often insisted upon retaining their name at marriage.
While some women are comfortable with taking on names of the spouse, for the feminists, there is always the question of why husbands can’t take up their wives’ names too.
Matilda Kobusinge wonders why men have expectations of women when it comes to duties that were once considered manly, but on the other hand cannot move with the flow, and for instance take on their wives’ names too.
"Well, the tradition wasn’t bad but according to me, it was a notion that was built showing that in a marriage, a man is a little more superior to the woman. Things like these have long changed, women have equal rights and this too can change,” Kobusinge argues.
She however says that she cannot scold women who choose to change their last name because decisions in life are all about one’s choice.
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I SAY: Would you take your spouse’s name?
It’s a sign of love
Leah Mutesi, Fashion Designer
Definitely, yes! I believe that when you agree to marry someone, that means you truly love that person, and you are ready to happily accept who he is, and this includes his name. Taking your spouse’s name is not only a sign of respect, but it also signifies the love and recognition you have for your partner. Personally, I would take it on with pleasure.
Share everything but not name
Christine Mutesi, Marketing and Salesperson
There is a lot a couple can share, for instance house, bank account, property-ownership, and secrets, but not the same name. Changing a name at some point can have some effects on a person’s career. For instance if you’re a journalist, your by-line would be affected.
It is not necessary
Christine Uwera, Administrator
Imagine the process one has to go through to change different legal and official documents, in case you take on your spouse’s name. It’s not only inconveniencing but it is also difficult. I don’t think it’s an easy thing to do. I believe what is important in a marriage is respect and the couple’s adherence to marriage principles.
It is a sign of commitment
Niceson Karungi, IT Business Analyst-Judiciary
Taking on your spouse’s name is a sign of admiration and value you give your spouse. When you marry someone, you commit to live and share everything you have with them. I don’t see why I would hesitate to take on my spouse’s name especially if I know that it would make him happy. Bearing someone’s name means walking in that person’s shoes, and that kind of responsibility is what builds marriage.
Compiled by Dennis Agaba