A handsome stranger came and sat next to me in church last Sunday. He said hello, and I, being distracted by his cologne and his smile, stammered before I replied, "I’m fine.” He smiled the way people do when they are on the verge of bursting into laughter.

I cursed myself under my breath many times after that and banged my forehead against an imaginary wall many,many times, repeating, "Hello. I’m fine.” 

I tried to console myself. "He is deaf in the right ear and therefore he didn’t hear me.” But I knew that he had definitely heard me. This was definitely going to haunt me for days to come. 

It was time to think of a way to redeem myself from this catastrophe. What if I asked him out on a date? I mean, this is the 21st century and women empowerment is a reality. So it wouldn’t be entirely strange to ask a man for his name, phone number and take him out to a meal, would it? Don’t answer that.

Once we were out on a date and we started talking, maybe he could find out that I really am smart and driven and that I definitely am not a stutterer. 

But what if I asked and he said no and even laughed in my face? Did I really know how to be a man about it? I say "be a man about it” because let’s face it; men have more experience in the area of rejection when it comes to love.

And it must be gut-wrenching. To plan and prepare and then ask someone out, only to be told, "No.” It doesn’t even matter how politely or indirectly it is put. A no is a no. It sucks. 

Maybe this explains why only a few women have the mettle to go after a man, to be so firm and aggressive about expressing their feelings. We have very delicate egos. I don’t think many women know how to handle rejection ‘like a boss.’

I then thought of what would happen if I asked and he said yes. Would I then attempt to emasculate him by offering to pick him up, pay for dinner and then take him home? Or would I now wait for him to take over even though I did the asking? 

Say we even found our way around the first-date-fiasco, what would happen then? Of course I’m just assuming that he didn’t find my asking him out to dinner completely crazy and that the date wasn’t his way of amusing himself and finding a good story to tell to his friends and his future wife, that undeserving *bad word* (I’m assuming). 

What would happen after the date? Would he now expect me to woo him, do things to keep him since he is handsome and other women would try to take him away from me? And then one day, I would get on one knee and propose marriage to him? 

I couldn’t gather the courage to ask him out. And anyway, by the time I was done thinking, the service was over and he was long gone.It was a sad day to be a woman, an old-fashioned one at that.