Your situation is sad and seems very stressful. I must say you seem both intelligent and quite promising.  You don’t deserve to be deprived of parental love and care regardless of whether you live with a stepmom or not.

The burden is on your father to create a harmonious environment for you in the home. I recommend strongly that you hold a mature talk with your father without verbally attacking or devaluing your stepmother, explain to your father how much she overworks you and how this denies you time to read books. Tell your dad how you miss him and how you feel that you two are becoming less close.

Perhaps your dad will then have a dialogue with your stepmother and things will improve. They should put your education at the centre of everything. If your dad won’t listen, talk to a responsible non-biased relative or your father’s closest friend and they will help you out. Try to be nice to your stepmom and as much as possible live by the foundational rules of the home. Your obedience and respect will make it impossible for her to resent you. She may drive you crazy but for purposes of maintaining peace, sometimes you just have to admit she’s right just for her own pleasure. Design a timetable and strike a balance between the domestic responsibilities and reading books.

Over time you may learn that it is possible to be less emotionally reactive to her insensitivity and live together peacefully. Education and discipline should be your key to all sorts of fabulous lifestyles and soon you will outgrow this situation to get out and test your true independence.

YOU DEBATE

Faith Gatera, employee Mount Kenya University

When it comes to education you must not take any chances. Talk to your father about what is happening and explain to him how the heavy workload is affecting your studies. As a parent, I’m sure he will understand.

Gilbert Hategikimana, teacher                       

Although your stepmother is mistreating you, she still has an obligation to take good care of you. Have a chat with her and request her to reduce on your load.

Stella Muteteri, MTN employee                                    

 It might be hard for you to get the courage to talk to your parents about the injustice they are subjecting you to but ask a teacher or school counsellor to do it on your behalf.

Micheal Tangishaka, student

Your dad is supposed to be your best friend and thus the right person to talk to. Your father is likely to understand your situation and ask your step mother to redistribute the work among all the children. All you have to do is talk to him.