I’m 19 years old and completed my senior six last year. My family expects me to join university to pursue law but that is not what I want to do. I want to take a catering course and start making and selling pastries online.

I shared this with my parents recently and they almost passed out. My mum says I am throwing my life away but I believe I can do this. They say they won’t help pay for this "mistake I’m making” and that if I choose to pursue it, I’m on my own. But this is my dream and I want to prove to them that I wasn’t wrong.

But where do I start? 

Samantha

The counselor’s thoughts...

Dear Samantha, it’s good to be obedient to our parents, however, your passion too matters a lot. This often causes a dilemma as we’re worried that if we are to trust our gut and follow our hearts, we may end up being disowned by the very people whose earlier decisions determined our life today.

There is need for serious dialogue with your parents. Sit down with them and explain the necessity of doing a catering course in the contemporary world. Some parents just have a misconception about such vocational courses as being less paying and of low class people.

Use success stories and society role models that have prospered tremendously through professional catering. Your parents’ resistance should not be seen as sabotaging your career plans. They feel they should protect your future and you have to forgive them for any resentment.

Explain to them however that a catering course can equally sail to any spectacular economic heights that you couldn’t possibly have gotten with the law course. Learn how to approach them softly during their good mood and establish strong connections by being obedient and polite so they can listen to you. You can involve some of your parent’s close friends to back you up.

Catering opens up networking opportunities, makes you familiar with trends, boosts your confidence and will equip you with more meaningful knowledge, plus significant life skill that will open more doors for you in the world.

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Your feedback: Readers advise Samantha

You still need your parents

Nyaminani Urimubenshi

It’s good to do something that you love, in fact, that should be every student’s goal in life regardless of what the parents want. However, when you’re still dependent, their opinions are of great importance in your decision making. In my opinion, don’t lose courage; continue to convince your parents because without their support, your dream career is in jeopardy.

Work on your approach

Faith Gatera

A good approach is more convincing than a thousand facts; I don’t know which approach you used initially when you told your mum about your dream career. However, this is what I think can help; find a good time when your mum is in a good mood, humbly explain to her how you enjoy catering and I believe with that approach, she will understand. Just be humble.

You can only succeed with passion

Mutesi Mabeyi

It’s good that you want to do something you’re passionate about. Passion is the foundation of success for any career. Kindly, explain to your parents that you’re only passionate about catering not law. Be honest and tell them that studying something you don’t love will be wasting their money and your future as well. It’s hard to succeed in something you don’t like. 

Do some research

Stella Muteteri

Do a broad research about your dream career and come up with facts that you think will make them interested in catering. Eventually, use those facts to convince your parents that you clearly know what you’re doing and you won’t disappoint them should they support you. To change a parent’s decision you need to be more convincing that they’re not wasting their money and you are not throwing your future away.

Contact successful people in catering

Eric Musore

They are many people who have succeeded in this particular career in Rwanda, and I believe those are the best people to ask for help. Your parents will be inspired to support you to follow in the footsteps of such successful people.

Compiled by Dennis Agaba

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You need success stories

Brenda Mutoni

Don’t blame your parents for not supporting your decision. It’s obvious they are not familiar with people who have succeeded in such a career. Those are the things you need to highlight when convincing them that your career is worth their support.

They need to know you won’t waste their money

Ethien Gakuru

Be more convincing; let your parents know how passionate you’re concerning your catering course. Parents are not bad at all, what they need is a clear assurance that they’re not wasting their money. Put your goals down on paper and explain to your parents the benefits of taking such a course.

Continue with law

Lavy Mutoni

Don’t go against your parents’ wishes as long as you’re still dependent. Just bear with their decision, study law and then after you can enroll in your catering course as extra expertise. We all have passions but it’s not a must that you study what you love. An active student can succeed in any course once they’re committed to it. You will have time to do what you love but first study what those who support you think is good for you.

You don’t have a plan

Mable K

My dear, all you seem to have is a crazy idea that success comes to anyone who goes for it. First of all, you will not believe what an asset a law degree is. Your parents are not stupid and catering is something you can do on th side. When you are done with school, you are free to take it on full time. Right now, you need to focus on doing the right thing, which is finishing school.

A succesful relative might help

Daisy C

In my opinion you need to talk to a family member who is respected at home and successful. Such people understand that passion is everything concerning career, and I believe that person can help you convince your parents to finance your desired career and make your dream come true.

Don’t give up on your dream

Justine Rwabahizi

In this era, it doesn’t matter which course is superior, what matters is a person’s passion and creativity. Don’t give up on your passion; if you don’t love law, it’s obvious you will be throwing away your future and your parent’s money.