Dear doctor;

I am 18 years old and I have been having issues with my consciousness. I tend to admire handsome males and try to be friends with them yet deep inside I only fancy heterosexual relationship. Recently, I have been getting wary with my like for males. Is something amiss with my sexual orientation? Worried Teen.

Dear Worried teen,

Admiring handsome males is but natural. During puberty, one may have sexually oriented feelings toward same gender, which tends to change as one grows up. Having sexual orientation toward same gender and actually having sex are two different things. Some may have normal heterosexual relations but may fantasise with same gender mentally at times. Some normal heterosexual persons do have sexual relations with another person of  same gender if living in loneliness as in men living in dormitories or prisoners. There are complex biological, hereditary, socio-cultural, religious factors at play. Some studies suggest hereditary factors in those who are confirmed homosexuals. For some, it is due to mental factors like having some unpleasant or fearful  experience with person of same gender. Sexual abuse as a child can also create repulsion for opposite gender. There is nothing to worry about. When the feelings are ‘normal’, there should be no reason to think otherwise. At this age, concentrate on your studies, developing skills and a good future. The issue in mind shall settle with time.