I hate hiccups. Yes, I guess this month is themed "inconvenient problems within our bodily functions”, especially if these problems manifest in our children. When it comes to hiccups, I don not think I know enough words in the English language, or any other, that can appropriately express just how much I detest hiccups.

They always happen at the most inconvenient of times. Watching another person suffering hiccups is also torture. I mean, how can it be easy to watch someone’s body taken over by this ‘thing’ that causes an involuntary, sudden and sometimes painful sharp intake of breath? And when children have hiccups, it seems especially cruel. All of their tiny body seems to rock with the force of the hiccup. The sound of the hiccup itself, and I hate to paint such a horrid picture, but that sound is like the strangling of a puppy or another young animal.

I hate hiccups! I hate them with a renewed passion now because the memory of the two-year-old struggling with them only yesterday is still very fresh. My little man hasn’t had hiccups since he was a baby so this very much felt like a first for him and he was both confused and terrified by this ‘thing’ taking over his body. It is the most heart breaking feeling when your child rushes to your side to ask you to fix a problem you know you do not really have the power to fix. 

I watched my child shriek "Mummy stop it! Stop it”, all the while pointing frantically at his throat. I did my best to calm him down and tried to explain that I cannot stop it but he can try to have a drink of water. He looked at me in bewilderment; I do not blame him, It probably did not make any sense to him how a drink of water could be related to the current problem. This only made him scream louder, getting him even more frustrated and angry as the hiccups kept interrupting his speech.

"Mum -hic- mummy lo -hic- ook!” as he pointed down his throat with his mouth wide open. He probably thought I just didn’t understand his problem. As gently as I could I tried to get him to try the one remedy that sometimes works for me, "Please baby, drink some water. That ‘thing’ will stop.” For no other reason than to humour me I think, he took a sip before he was interrupted by another giant hiccup. He looked at me with so much disappointment and then turned to his nanny and pleaded, "Help me! –hic.”

He was so frustrated, I was frustrated and we were both close to tears.

They look at you with so much trust- yet each time you tell them to try a solution that doesn’t work that look of trust changes to a look of betrayal. I guess as guardian and guide to these young lives, it is only natural that they should trust us, the parents, to deal with and ‘fix’ all their problems. In a way it is a compliment that someone trusts you so much, which takes me back to why I hate hiccups. These hiccups may give my two-year-old a reason not to trust me. Why? Because I cannot ‘fix’ his problem.

I really, really hate hiccups!