A few years ago, I decided to hook up with a chick from ULK University. That is why I was often seen heading to a place called Kimicanga. This is where ULK used to be based before it shifted to its mega complex on the Gisozi Hill.

Kimicanga was the place where I could be seen seated firmly on a moto heading for evening visits to attract the lady of my heart.

As I mentioned already, ULK has since shifted from Kimicanga to Gisozi. I guess that the ULK administration had feared the very name of Kimicanga! This word sounded as if there was so much sand around the campus. Since there was no beach within the vicinity, then Kimicanga would probably have to refer to the dusty, bumpy road that headed towards this famous school. 

So, one evening as I was approaching the campus, a mad truck driver rolled down the bumpy road at breakneck speed. The headlight lamps torched right into the biker’s eyes and what ensued was not pleasant at all. The bike swerved across the road tossing both the rider and myself into the nearby bushes.

By the time bwana Diaspoman emerged from the bushes, he looked like a thug who had spent several months without eating and without washing. It was at that moment when a cool Jeep cruised along towards campus. The Jeep stopped after realising that there was a bike in the middle of the road. The rider himself also looked as if he had been beaten up by a mob of thieves.

The people in the Jeep jumped out quickly to save the situation. As they came closer, I noticed that it was a couple that happens to be Aggrey’s rich friends. Aggrey and I had paid them a visit a few weeks ago. I remember that when we had last visited this couple, I had convinced them that I was an IT expert, whose consultancy offices were situated in the heart of Dubai.

Now here I was in a total mess. I realised that if these good Samaritans identified me, two things would follow. Firstly, they would immediately call Aggrey to announce the bad news.

Secondly, they would know that I was not a top class executive all the way from Dubai. That would surely kill off my reputation. So, in order to cover up, I decided to do the wisest thing that I could think about! I decided to run! "Hey hey, we want to help you! Hey hey” As I continued to run, I sensed that someone was running after me! When I looked back, I realised that the moto rider was hot on my heels "My money, my money!”

Before I could dip my hand in the pocket to pull out the cash, the moto rider jumped up like Jackie Chan or Bruce Lee or even Jet Lee himself. His foot flew towards my jaw as I tried to dodge him. Instantly he was on top of me thumping me! "Thief, thief, thief!” I struggled under his weight and managed to pull out the cash. I then continued running through all the short cuts until I reached to a place of safety! Phew! That was really close. 

At least, these rich friends of Aggrey didn’t see me and therefore I could continue posing as a real IT consultant. But what I promised myself on that evening was that I would no longer pursue my wedding dreams in a place called Kimicanga!