If I had a franc for every time I heard that line, I would be quite financially comfortable. The gorgeous women living in this city love to use this as an excuse as to why they do not find suitable partners. Personally, I believe that there is the possibility to have a pretty good dating pool to choose from, if you put yourself out there enough to be courted.

I have friends who are in great relationships and others who are single and loving it. I am not here to tell all women to jump into relationships but the ones who are ready to be in one should take certain measures in their life to be more social and open to meeting new people.

We always joke that our conservative old school parents are the only ones who care about the pedigree of our social circle but as the years go by, I find it interesting that a lot of young women will describe a man by the school he went to, where he went to university (Rwanda vs abroad) the family he comes from, his friends and of course his job. No matter how many times we tell ourselves we don’t care about that above information, we find ourselves, or our friends, falling into that trap which sometimes keeps you from meeting someone outside your social circle.

Then there is the classic "I don’t have time to date”. I know this may be true for some people, but I do not understand it at all. So what you are telling me is that you have time to go on numerous wine and dine sessions with your girls but you don’t have time to have a lunch/dinner/coffee with a man? Okay, I get it if you are short on time in life between career, family and friends, but you have to eat sometimes, and maybe one of those meals can be shared with a lovely gentleman. Believe me, try it and you may enjoy the company of someone else other than your girlfriends. By the way, I love my girlfriends, but you don’t keep me warm at night. Just saying.

So 21st century ladies, stop making excuses and stop saying no to the men who ask you out, if he looks like a good guy and you make a good connection on your first interaction, why not take up his offer on lunch or dinner? It won’t hurt you, the worst that can happen is if you find out you really don’t have that connection but at least you got a meal out of it and maybe even a new friend.

How many dates have you turned down in the recent months and why? Do you really believe Kigali is the worst place for dating?