I was shocked by this week’s main story. I couldn’t believe there are so many little sisters who seduce their sibling’s husband or partner.

My natural response to reading these women’s experiences was to ask who is to blame: the sister or the husband? No doubt the victims of the betrayal have grappled with the very same question.

The instinct to lay blame is overwhelmingly strong because it is the only relief for painful emotions. Sometimes the target of blame is obvious, sometimes not; but loss and grief must have their scapegoats.

However, it is in fact when we cease laying blame that we either take responsibility for our own contributions, or become free to recognise that blame is irrelevant.

Laying blame is a waste of energy which could be better directed at repairing damage or starting afresh.

As I write I am fully aware of the emotionally detached nature of this advice but hope that when the anger subsides, these women can separate themselves from their pain and find a way to move forward.

No easy task, that’s for sure. I forgot to mention last week, that we have a really exciting new column by Berna Namata.

Berna is passionate about ‘girl power’ and woman2woman is especially for all you ladies out there. Read for Nurse Felicia’s new column.

Felicia, a trained nurse, has given up some of her valuable time to answer your health questions. So don’t be shy, drop her a line. Until next week, take care.

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